Depression in the Light of Depressing Emotion
Depression in the Light of Depressing Emotion
A Different Way to Understand What You are Experiencing
Let’s talk about depression—maybe not the way you have always heard it described, but in a way that might actually resonate with your lived experience.
Have you ever felt like you’re carrying this deep, heavy weight and you don’t even know why?
Like something inside you has just shut down?
You can still go through the motions—maybe you are showing up at work, taking care of others, even smiling on the outside—but the spark’s gone. You feel numb, flat, tired all the time. Nothing really reaches you.
This is often what we call depression. And sometimes, it is what we call high-functioning depression. You might not “look” depressed to others. You might even be praised for how much you handle. But inside, there’s a quiet collapse. A heaviness. A sense of being utterly alone with it all.
I want to invite a different perspective—one that’s helped me and many others begin to make sense of it.
What if depression isn’t just a mental illness?
What if, at least in part, it’s a result of depressing your emotions?
What Does It Mean to “Depress” Emotion?
Think of it like this: from an early age, many of us learned that certain emotions were not safe to feel—let alone express. Anger made us scary or unlovable. Sadness made us too much. Needing someone made us weak. So we stuffed those feelings down.
But they do not just disappear. Emotions are energy (energy in motion), and when we do not acknowledge, or express them, they do not go away—they go inward. They build up in the body, the nervous system, and even in the brain.
And over time, that constant suppression—that depressing of emotion—can lead to a kind of shutdown. Your system gets overwhelmed and says, “No more.” And that is when we start to feel what we call depression—even if everything “looks fine” from the outside.
The Brain in Shutdown Mode
This is not just emotional—it’s neurobiological.
When your system is flooded or feels unsafe for too long, your brain and body can shift into a kind of survival mode. It’s called a dorsal vagal state (a fancy way of saying: shut down to survive).
In this state:
The parts of your brain that help you think clearly and reflect (like the prefrontal cortex) slow down.
The emotional centers of the brain may go numb or hyperactive.
Motivation, pleasure, and energy drop as neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin get disrupted.
It is not because you are broken. It is because your system is protecting you from feeling something it believes is too much.
What If Depression Is Protective?
That idea might sound strange, especially if you have been taught to see depression as a flaw or failure.
But what if it is a kind of wisdom? A way your system is saying: “I’ve been holding too much for too long. I need to power down.”
In that sense, depression—even high-functioning depression—can be a signal. A slowing down. A forced pause. It might be the only way your body knew how to say: “I’m overwhelmed. I need help. I need space to feel what’s never been felt.”
So What Now?
Instead of asking yourself, “What’s wrong with me?”
A better question is:
“What have I been holding down?”
“What parts of me have been exiled for so long, they gave up on being felt?”
“What emotion have I never been allowed to fully experience—and what would it be like to meet it now, with gentleness, curiosity, and support?”
This is where somatic work comes in—reconnecting with the body, listening to its cues, and slowly, safely allowing those buried emotions to surface and move.
Because you are not broken. You are carrying something that was never meant to be carried alone.
And the truth is, you do not have to keep pushing it down.
There is space now—for all of you.
P.S. This Isn’t Just Poetic — It’s Backed by Research
Everything I shared here isn’t just a comforting idea — it’s rooted in real, evidence-based psychology. This way of understanding depression pulls from powerful therapeutic models and research that help make sense of what’s going on beneath the surface.
Polyvagal Theory helps us understand why we sometimes shut down — it’s our nervous system trying to protect us when things feel like too much.
Emotion regulation research shows how pushing emotions down over time can lead to distress — our bodies keep the score, even if our minds try to move on.
Somatic psychology teaches that emotions don’t just live in the mind — they live in the body too, and need space to move through us.
Neuroscience shows how chronic stress and emotional suppression can change brain chemistry, affecting our mood, energy, and clarity.
Parts work (like IFS) helps us see that symptoms like depression often come from protective parts that have been carrying too much for too long.
Compassion-based therapies remind us that healing starts with softness, curiosity, and being kind to ourselves when we feel the most stuck.
So while this is a soulful reflection, it’s also deeply supported by science.
Because healing doesn’t have to be either/or — we can honor both science and soul on the path to feeling whole again.